In our days, divorce is a pretty common thing. Every third marriage falls apart. Couples simply forget all the positive emotions they’ve been through together. A lot of people ask themselves if their relationship is worth saving. Of course, it is! Preserving a family is very difficult and huge work, and most importantly, to avoid such an awful thing as divorce, both spouses must have a mutual desire to work on mistakes.
The first thing you need to keep your marriage afloat is to find out what caused the conflict in your family. Here are some tips to help you solve the main problems and keep them at bay them in the future.
Many couples try to save their union, but their attempts still fail. This happens because both partners have no clear understanding of why they should repair their broken relationship. Often, they’re motivated by the fear of starting a new life, the fear of ending up alone and being judged by relatives and neighbors. Another reason is children and the fear of hurting them.
Analyze your desires and consider whether one of these fears lies at the heart of your goal to save your marriage. Living together for the sake of kids is a bad idea. You should fight for your family only when you truly want to return the good feelings you experienced with your loved one before and when you realize that you want to live your whole life with this person no matter what.
Go for a dialogue
Once you’re sure that you want to fix your marriage, gather up the courage and go for an honest and frank dialogue where each of you can talk about what aspects of your relationship must be changed. Be ready to hear a lot of new things about yourself and see yourself through the eyes of your spouse. Try to understand them. The main thing about the dialogue is not to interrupt each other and be able not only to listen but also to hear. Give each other a promise to work on mistakes.
In any conflict, both sides are to blame, especially when it comes to the family matters. After a frank conversation, find out what exactly your soul mate doesn’t like. But don’t provoke an escalation of the conflict; one-sided reproaches are useless, as well.
Focus on the positive qualities
Unfortunately, we usually see only negative traits in each other, and completely ignore positive ones. The desire to cherish the traits we used to love fades away, and love and care are taken for granted. Start to admire each other again and rediscover the best qualities in your loved one.
Saving your marriage after cheating
Cheating is the worst cause of divorce. Different people have their own attitude towards the concept itself. Only you can decide whether to break up or save your family, relying on your ability to forgive and not to remember past sins. If you choose to save the marriage, the algorithm remains the same, with only one difference – the first and most important rule is to forgive and never return to this awful problem again. The main step on the path to preserving relations in the family is love.